My Boss Loves My Idiot Co-Worker
For once, i'm not writing about anything remotely to do with a Bon Jovi tribute band, other than revealing that its what kept me sane during a period in my life when while working an excremental 9-5 job, had to suffer an experience that most of us do at sometime. Yes......my boss loved my f*****g moranic co-worker. I wouldn't have been suprised if this co-worker had to ask for advice on which orifice she should be defacating out of. This person was literally, totally, unqualified for the job she did, and the knowledge she had of the profession she stumbled into could have been written on the back of a postage stamp with space left over! At the time, the band was my release, my stress ball, my way of not killing anyone!
Friends always seem to ask me for advice on all kinds of things, don't know why, maybe the expression on my face when i'm trying to remember my own name makes me look like i'm listening avidly lol. Anyways, someone was telling me their very similar, current problem, and it reminded me of my own situation. I remember it felt like one of those movies where you know who the murderer is, or you know that some ungrateful dick is cheating on the gorgeous, lovely, girlfriend. I remember thinking "they will get found out one day." Unfortunately in real life that day never seemed to come and the retard just went from strength to strength. To make matters worse, i had many years of experience and the relevant know how as well as courses under my belt to have done the job! The lack of logic employed by all concerned drove me mad. If you were running a business, would you employ someone to do an important, management job who didn't have the relevant qualifications, experience or know how? If your car had a major fault on it, would you take it to a qualified mechanic or tell someone you like they can have a go at fixing it?....hey why not just stop someone on the street at random huh? "Hi gormless teenager, have you ever repaired a car before?.....no?......okay, please can you replace my car engine."
The whole situation made me miserable. I had to sit there and watch/listen to this infected tampon(co worker) constantly ask for advice on how to do the most basic of tasks, make its way through tasks at a snail's pace, and simply not do 75% of what a person in its capacity should do, on account of the fact that it didn't know that it should be doing those things in the first place because it had no knowledge of them! Aaaaaaaaargh!!!.........is it me??.....or does the world just simply not make sense sometimes?? By the way, i did mean to call this person "it" in this paragraph. As i tell the story, i'm getting more and more annoyed. It got to the point where even hearing that turd's voice grated on my nerves and all i wanted to do by the end of the day was kick it in the throat just to shut it the hell up. I'd like to be a better person......but that's the truth. I imagined how good it would feel to kick the bitch in the mouth in mid sentence and then say "sorry, i tripped." Anyways, i could go on forever, but you get the idea and i'm now bored, and i can't find my stress ball, so i'm going to end the story. The bottom line is if you find yourself in this kind of situation, you really need to look for another job, because unfortunately in real life people like this can be dropped in a swimming pool full of shit and they will still come up smelling of roses. Sorry, but your boss will always think your idiot co-worker is the best pet he's ever had. For your sanity, try a new challenge........or kick your co-worker in the mouth and pretend it was an accident......your choice. :)